Blog Archives

5 Things I’ve Learned About Tinder in the Past 24 Hours

I gave up Tinder (and 4 other dating apps) for Lent. I am unbelievably proud of myself for doing this but I was a little too excited to download them again once Lent ended.

Yesterday morning, I downloaded Tinder again as I laid in bed with no electricity and began my swipe journey.

These are 5 things I learned since being back on Tinder in the past 24 hours


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Taking Back My Brave

I heard his voice today. In my head. It’s been so long I have almost forgotten what it sounds like.

It happened at church. The priest was reading the gospel and I closed my eyes, just for a moment, and I could hear him tell me one of the many jokes I had heard time and time again before.


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FNF – March 11, 2016

Happy Friday, WordPress friends! I haven’t blogged about other things in a while because I have successfully been able to keep my anxiety under control for the most part and have given up on boys and coffee.

In the meantime, here is this week’s facebook note Friday.

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Learning to Fly

In September, I wrote a post about things I had learned from guys I’ve gone on dates with called Finding Myself in Mr. Wrong.

Here we are a few months later, after deleting all 5 dating apps off of my phone, and I have learned many more lessons about life and myself.

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FNF – Feb. 19, 2016

Happy Friday, friends! I’m taking a break from writing a paper on why people have unprotected sex to bring you this week’s edition of Facebook Note Friday. Welcome to my boring life. Enjoy!

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The King & The Notch

I love the way you make me feel

When I’m with you, I feel like I can conquer the world
Achieve bigger and better things
Your dreams are just as big as mine are
Can you imagine what we could accomplish together?

You could be Jay-Z and I could be your Beyonce.
Together we could build an empire

I hate the way you make me feel

When I’m without you
I don’t feel like I am of much value
Just a notch on your belt
In your bed

You said you were different
You showed that you could be
But then why do I question everything?

We both said time is precious
And I would hate to be wasting it

The Thing About Counselling

I haven’t been to talk therapy for my Panic Disorder since I graduated from university in June.

It’s now January of 2016. And today, I went to see a counsellor.


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FNF – Jan. 08, 2016

1: Could you go the rest of your life without smoking a cigarette?


2: Are you single/taken/heartbroken/confused?

Confused… but getting over it. So let’s say single.

3: What if I told you that you were pretty?

Thank you

4: Ever been told “it’s not you, it’s me”?

I can’t recall.

5: Are you interested in anyone right now?

We’ll see where things with this new guy goes.

6: What are you looking forward to in the next week?


7: Do you want to be single?

I actually don’t mind it.

8: Did you go out or stay in last night?

Stayed in. Got home from work late.

9: How late did you stay up last night?

Maybe like midnight.

10: Can you recall the last time you realized you liked someone a lot?

A week ago.

11: Last three things you had to drink?

Water, gatorade, tea.

12: Have you pretended to like someone?

In a non-romantic way, yes.

13: Have you ever told somebody you loved them and not actually meant it?


14: Honestly, has anyone seen you in your underwear in the past 3 months?


15: Is it hard for you to get over someone?

It can be.

16: Think back five months ago, were you single?

I was.

17: What were you doing at 12:30 this afternoon?

I think I was out with my friend Alex obsessing over boys who don’t text back.

18: Hold hands with anyone this week?


19: Could you go for the rest of your life without drinking alcohol?

I could but would rather not.

20: What would you name your future daughter?


21: Do you miss anyone?

I miss my dad more than anything.

22: Have you kissed three or more people in one night?

I don’t think so. Maybe I have. I actually don’t know.

23: Did your last kiss take place in/on a bed?

In a car, I believe.

24: Are you good at hiding your feelings?

Yes. Usually.

25: Have you ever cried from being so mad?


26: Who did you last see in person?

My mom

27: Are you listening to music right now?

Nope, I am watching Parks and Rec.

28: What is something you currently want right now?

money, sleep, my assignment to be over

29: What is the last thing you said out loud?


30: How is your heart lately?

It was not feeling so good last week but it’s feeling a lot better.

31: Do you wear the hood on your hoodie?

Not usually.

32: Are you wearing socks?

I never wear socks to bed, so no.

33: What do people call you?


34: Will you talk to the person you like tonight?

Don’t really like anyone at the moment, but this guy I’m talking to is pretty cool.

35: Are there any stressful situations in your life?

A little bit.

36: Who did you last share a bed with?


37: Did you do something bad today?

I did.

38: When was the last time a member of the opposite sex hugged you?


39: Do you get stressed out easily?

I have anxiety, so yes.

40: Will you sing today?


41: Have you ever wanted to tell someone something but didn’t?


42: Who do you go to when you need to talk to someone?

My best friends.

43: Have you ever been taken to the emergency room in an ambulance?

No, but I have been in one when my dad went to the hospital.

44: What are you listening to right now?

Parks and rec.

45: What is wrong with you right now?

What isn’t.

46: What is on your wrists right now?


47: Where did you get the shirt/sweatshirt you’re wearing?


48: What do you like better: hot chocolate or hot apple cider?

Hot chocolate, but I do love cider

49: Do you make wishes at 11:11?

Not so much.

50: Are you a good artist?

I like art, but some people think I am.

51: Love really is a beautiful thing huh?

I guess

52: Do you miss the way things were six months ago?

No, I love my life now despite the feelings I’m having.

53: Ever been on a golf cart?

I have many times.

54: Do you have trust issues?

A little

55: Ever stayed up all night on the phone, with who?

Many times with many great people.

56: Do you own something from Hot Topic?

Not anymore, but I used to

57: Do you use chap stick?

Yes. Especially in winter

58: Have you ever slapped someone in the face?

Not with force

59: Do you have a little sister?

I do not

60: Have you ever been to New York?

Yes, and it is magical

61: Think of the last person who said I love you, do you think they meant it?

My mom means it for reals.

62: Have you hugged someone within the last week?


63: What were you doing at midnight last night?

Probably trying to fall asleep

64: Have you ever regretted kissing someone?

No haha

65: Is there one person in your life that can always make you smile?

Yep, I have the best friends.

66: Were your last three kisses from the same person?

They were.

67: Have you kissed anyone in the last five days?


68: Would you rather sleep with someone else or alone?

I love having all the space so alone.

69: Will next Friday be a good one?


The Pool

So if you’ve been in my inner circle in the past four days (but feels like a lifetime), you’ll know that the most recent event in my life is that I got “ghosted.”

First of all, the fact that “ghosting” is a word in pop culture today makes me want to punch someone in the face. The fact that the action exists makes me even more mad.

Second of all, if you ghost someone, I hate you. There, I said it. It does not make things “any easier” by just shutting them out of your life completely seemingly out of nowhere. It’s one thing to drift away and talk to them less and let the person see it coming. But being blindsided is a pain I cannot explain.

Maybe I’m overreacting (I’m probably overreacting) to the whole situation. I want to describe it all to you. I really do. But honestly, it’s a waste of my time and energy and a waste of yours to read it.

If you are still not entirely sure what ghosting is, see the image below (thanks Google images).


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Cynicism Reborn

Things often don’t go according to plan. So if you catch yourself planning, stop. Just stop.

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Embracing Authenticity

"Don't be ashamed of your story it will inspire others!"

Site Title

“Love recognizes no barriers. It jumps hurdles, leaps fences, penetrates walls to arrive at its destination full of hope.” — Maya Angelou

Lonely Blue Boy

The Boy Who Cries Wolf

Rachel O'Boyle

Learning to cope with anxiety, grief, & dating in my 20s.